I really like answering machines more than voicemail on a smart phone. It's easier to ignore calls if you aren't constantly reminded you have calls. Anyway, here are some make-up voicemail greetings.
01 - I'm not in today. I may not be in tomorrow. I may not be in next week but rest assured, I am somewhere ignoring your call. In any case, please leave a message so I can ignore that too.
02 - You have reached an unauthorized number. By leaving a message, you have approved to have people in dark suits come to your house after the end of the call. They will give you a full body check and press you to take several mind tests. Be assured, they will not harm you as long as you cooperate with them. If you think you can handle all that, leave a message, and if not, hang up.
03 - Currently, there is no one at home. This might or might not be true but please leave a message if you wish to find out.
04 - We're screening all calls and if your message is not in proper grammar, we will not return your call.
05 - Please do leave a message after the beep. All messages will be re-routed to a judging official who will judge if I should return your call or not.
06 - I can't come to the phone right now and I can't tell you why but rest assured no one will get hurt if you leave a brief message but make sure you used ten words or less or else we'll all be in trouble. Just kidding. Maybe.
07 - Hello, is it me you're looking for? Then leave a message.
What kind of greetings would you leave on your voicemail?
Fun!
ReplyDeleteChristine: Glad you think so. Thank you for coming by. Have a lovely day
DeleteThese are blunt and to the point! The best voicemail greeting I ever heard was a short and simple one -- "You know what to do." So many layers of meaning to that one, LOL!
ReplyDeleteDebra She Who Seeks: Blunt yes, that's why it's called Honest voicemail greetings.
Delete"You know what to do." - sounds good and to the point.
Thank you for coming by. Have a lovely day.
I do like message No 3. Rather a lot.
ReplyDeleteElephant's Child: No. 3 would be the one that is most true for me. I'm not much of a phone person.
DeleteThank you for coming by. Have a lovely day.
#1 is my favorite. Another thing I've thought of doing (but haven't) is leaving famous movie quotes as my message...
ReplyDeleteGreg: Using movie quotes is a great idea for voicemail greetings. I there is a famous one from the movie Taken that some people uses minus the violence bits.
DeleteThank you for coming by. Have a lovely day.
I like #1 the best. #7 reminds me of a song- Lionel Ritchie?
ReplyDeleteSorry if this is a duplicate- I commented earlier but it's gone nw...
Greg: Your first comment got unpublished and marked as spam. I have restored it. And yes, that last one was kind of like that Lionel Ritchie song. Somehow, everytime I hear the word hello, I sort of hear a bit of that song.
DeleteThank you for coming by. Have a lovely day.
"In any case, please leave a message so I can ignore that too."
ReplyDelete😂
Roberta: I'm not a phone person so that #1 is totally what I would use if I didn't mind being rude.
DeleteThank you for coming by. Have a lovely day.
I swore, I posted a comment on this post. I'll post it again though.
ReplyDelete"and if your message is not in proper grammar, we will not return your call."
That's so funny.😂
I also love #2.
-Quinley
Quinley: Well, I didn't see any of your comments in the spam filter but who knows, maybe your comment did disappear.
Delete#2 - I have no idea why I wrote that but I like it.
Thank you for coming by. Have a lovely day.