"My life is spent in one long effort to escape from the commonplaces of existence." — Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
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February 16, 2024

Fiction: The Insomniac Nighthawk 2

First the part here.

Fiction: The Insomniac Nighthawk 2

I turned to the first page. The dedication was: To my unkind wife: Thank you for 15 years of abuse and neglect. What the hell?
    I kept on. A brief introduction by the author: This is my book and yet, it's not. This is my great tribute to the literary society. I hope everyone would deem this the most perfect book they have ever read and if they don't, the hell with them. Sincerely, Stanley Denny.
    This guy was a bit egotistic, wasn't he? I turned the page. What I found was this:
    I flipped through the pages. The whole title repeated over and over and some of the words are even upside down. The only thing that was different was the last page where it featured an illustration of a man carrying a pocket watch and above him were the words in large capital letters, THE END OF TIME. What the hell was this? Was this the book everyone coveted?
    "Woo-woo" echoed above me. I looked up. A white owl with black feathers on its chest was flying above. Its glass eyes stared down at me. Then it flew away. What was an owl doing in a bookstore?
    The sound of footsteps came toward me. I looked up.
    "Uh-oh, did I disturb your reading? I swear I was as quiet as can be." The small woman smiled. Two eyes stared out at me from the pile of the woman's hair. No, those weren't just hair - a cat was perched on her head - its white fur blended perfectly with the woman's white hair.
    "Mr. Den— I mean, Winter, wanted me to get this for you." The woman placed the steaming white mug on the book pile to my left. I started to stand up.
    "Oh no, don't get up. Sit. Sit." The cat on her head purred. "I'm Mrs. Flip, one of Winter's employees."
    "Mrs. Flip?" I raised my eyebrows.
    "F-L-I-P. Flip." Mrs. Flip smiled. "And now I must go. I need to go and check on Yum-Yum, make sure he doesn't eat any more books." She smiled and turned to rush off.
    "Who's Yum-Yum?" I asked as I sat back down.
    "The baby yeti, of course!" came the answer as Mrs. Flip disappeared behind a bookshelf.
    Baby yeti? Here in a bookstore? Or was she kidding?
    I picked up the mug and took a sniff. Coffee. I smiled and took a slow sip. Coffee with honey and something I couldn't decide but I took another sip. Warmth ran through my body. I placed the mug back onto the book pile and flipped through the pages again. Was this book a joke? Had someone played a joke on me?
    "Yippee!"
    I couldn't tell which direction the cry was coming from. It was too quiet here. My own breathing seemed a tad too loud.
    "Yippee!"
    There it was again. I stood up. Over the piles of books and shelves, I couldn't see anyone. Someone must be reading something exciting. I sat back down on the steps. The paperback was in my hand and yet, I couldn't believe this book actually existed. I had read tons of unusual books but this had gone a bit too far. How could it had been printed?
    "Meh-eh-eh!"
    Was that a goat? I recalled seeing a goat as I walked the aisles but it had been my imagination hadn't it?
    "Oh, I didn't know anyone was back here. I'm sorry to interrupt, sir." The tall, young lady held a few hardcovers close to her chest. She was wearing a white shirt with a round collar underneath a dark green jacket and a long black skirt. Her auburn hair was parted in the center with plaits in back.
    I smiled at the lady. Where did she come from? "It's alright, ma'am. I'm just reading. And call me Fish."
    "Fish?" she chuckled, causing the little curls on her forehead to shake.
    "Yes, that's my name. Fish Lang. It's an odd name, I know." I smiled.
    She nodded. "You... do not call me ma'am. Call me Victoria..." Her eyes blinked rapidly. "I think I'll leave you to your space."
    "No, no, you don't have to go." I stood up.
    She raced away. Was I so unfriendly that everyone just wanted to leave me alone?
    I sighed and sat down again. I opened the paperback and looked again. There was no way I'm going to sell this to Ted's friend. Once he had a glance at it, he would immediately back out any deal. A coo sounded.
    "How do you like it?" said Winter. "Is it worth the pages it was printed on?"
    Did Winter made any sound? I didn't hear his footsteps. I shrugged. "Why is it written like that? And where is the time traveler or even the time travel?"
    "Ah, you believe a book should live up to its title then?" Winter tucked his hands into his pants' pockets.
    I nodded slowly. "Kind of..."
    "Before you ask, yes, that is the original print and yes, it was written like that. A lot of people came, read it, left it. Who wants to admit to paying for such a book even at such a low price?"
    "You could sell this for thousands or even millions."
    "I could but I don't care to make money off something I am not the least bit proud of. My great-grandfather was an egotistic man. This book only existed because his rich friends printed it as a joke but Stanley thought he had written the perfect book and yet, when he found out it wasn't, it didn't stop him from selling it to some fool. You don't want to know how much he got for it but it was certainly enough for him to live a couple of years drinking and gambling without problems."
    I flipped to the cover. "Stanley Denny was your great-grandfather?"
    Winter nodded. "Yes, I am ashamed to admit it. Honestly, I didn't want to admit to having any connection with the man. Now you know what the book is. Do you want to buy it?"
    I shook my head. Even if I can sell it to anyone, I would feel like a fool for doing it. I closed the book and stood up. "Take it back. I don't want to buy it." I held the book out toward him.
    Winter took it from me. "I thought I have to find another book to level that table but thanks to you, you save me the work."
    I smiled. Perhaps I had too much pride to buy the book.
    Winter put the paperback back under one of the table legs. He stood up and pushed his eyeglasses higher. "Hey, want to read something wild?"    
    "Sure," I said. I got time. I didn't even have to work in a few hours.
    Winter sorted through the pile on the table. Then he threw a book at me. I caught it. It was a hardcover. "Try that. You might like it." He grinned.
    I checked out the title: How to stop worrying and enjoy being an insomniac. I smiled. There was a cooing sound. I looked up. An owl was circling above. It had the same black feathers on its chest as the owl before. It paused to glance at me and then flew off. I looked down. Winter was gone. He must had rushed off.
    A loud boom sounded and the floor shook. I grabbed the railing but the shaking had stopped. Winter's voice came over a speaker which I could not locate anywhere. "Dear readers, please forgive the disruption. Rest assure, that was not an earthquake. I repeat, that was not an earthquake. Carry on with your reading. Thank you and have a nice day."
    I laughed and sat down on one of the steps and opened the book. I might as well read and forget my worries for a spell.
    There was a slight tapping sound. "Um, sorry to interrupt again but we may have a problem. If paper airplanes started to appear out of nowhere, do not worry. As long as you avoid them, you won't get a paper cut. If necessary, move yourself elsewhere. Thank you for your understanding and have a nice day."
    I laughed. Was Winter serious? Something white fell at my feet. I picked it up. It was a paper airplane. More fell from above. I looked about but the airplanes were just appearing out of the air. Above, the elevated space was untouched. I picked up my mug and walked up the stairs and around the piles of books toward the elevated space and sat down in one of the chairs. The airplanes fell around me but I paid no attention to them as I started reading.   

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

This week's Words for Wednesday prompts are provided by me over here. This week's prompts are: meh, woo, yum, uh-oh, yippee.

3 comments:

  1. I love this quirky bookshop...and you even produced a fake book page!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Roberta R.: Acutally, the fake book was going to be the repeat of all those onomatopoeias but I decided this was slightly better. I would like a quirky bookstore like this too.

      Thank you for coming by. Have a lovely day.

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